zoom zoom

working in retail can honestly be interesting. if you’re looking- you may even see lessons in life that can be applied to your own life. last week, there was a mom and kid who walked in. the kid looked and said, “mommy, i want the zhu zhu pet!”. the mom kind of smiled and nodded, kind of hoping her kid would just let it go on the thought- that yes, it was somewhat cool but not cool enough to buy. then, you can guess it- the kid says, “moMMIIIEEEEEE I WANT A ZHU ZHU PET!!!!” the mom then asks, “how much are your pets?” i go on to explain the prices and the mom explains to the child- that if she gets it now, she won’t have anything to get for her birthday. The kid didn’t care- she wanted it right then! as i checked them out and told them to have a nice day, all i could think of was, “man! that kid was so so impatient!”

then i realised just how impatient i am. how about 93% of my problems seem like problems mostly due to impatience. for example, when i’m driving- yes, i get road rage- most of the time because people aren’t going the speed limit and i’m running right on time- which means i could be late because of these people blocking my way. impatience. in my mind i’ve created timelines for when God needs to intervene because otherwise it’s a problem. impatience. sometimes not trusting that things will work out. impatience.-hanging out with people that i know will eventually cause me pain- even if it’s unintentional just because i’m lonely...impatience.

how often am i that little kid? screaming my lungs out on how i really want something that really doesn’t matter and if i would just wait- i would’ve already gotten it in the first place- maybe something better. I remember hearing when i was a kid that God loves us so much that if we continue to beg for something- just like that parent, God will give us what we want. I guess now that I’m older, I look at that- and it hasn’t really worked out that way- but i’m really glad it hasn’t. because to me, that means that God is so bigger than me. that in certain situations, He has to intervene because there isn’t any other way humanly possible for things to work out. i mean, i get the point- but it’s that whole new way of looking at thing- that’s coming to light.

i guess my views of things are changing- i love it when that happens. sometimes it makes me feel all grown up coming up with new realisations and ephiphanys. i used to think that God uses things, people and situations to teach us lessons. and then i thought about that- whenever i think about “teaching someone a lesson” it’s not a good thing. it’s usually a “i have the ability to kick your butt because i’m bigger or better than you in some way, shape or form”. and i thought...that doesn’t sound like God to me-well not mine. instead of teaching a lesson- just maybe He uses things, people, situations and even our pain to make us better people. that sounds more like God to me.

but realising things is the first step and the easiest. it’s believing it that’s the hard part. i guess it’s the time when that whole trust thing comes in. it makes me glad for hope that is given. that everyday, I can choose joy. it’s not exactly easy...but then again, He never said it would be.

-P